Thursday, December 12, 2013

Alcohol is totally okay for babies.

I have this really great friend who was telling me about this book I should read. The book is all about getting creative, and letting our kids see us make space to be creative. I still haven't read this book, and I don't know the title of it, but I totally recommend it.

Anyway, in honor of the spirit of this book I haven't read, I've started trying to make space for creativity.

Yesterday I made this:


When I was in 7th grade I told everyone I wanted to be an impressionist painter.

Probably a good idea that I moved on. It is fun to paint, and it felt good to create. I do so adore  Mason jars. The bonus of this whole thing was that for once I was actually, and it's not too painful to say this, thankful for the lace curtains that hang (or used to) in this house.

What I really miss doing is writing. I do love to tell a good story. This past year, moving into our new house, and becoming the mama to three, I've learned a lot. I thought I'd start telling stories about these little lessons. I hope you enjoy them.
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One day, after the craziness of RSV was over, I was having a good day. You know those days. I was totally rocking the mama thing:

  • I had taken a shower and even slapped on some makeup. 
  • All three girls were dressed in something other than pajamas. 
  • I organized and executed a craft for Brynne and Hadley all while I was nursing Ruby. 

Yeah. I had this, Being the Mama of Three, figured out. Nailed it. Totally not hard.

I had even made dinner. From scratch.

I left Ruby, contentedly playing on her play mat, while Brynne and Hadley were reading books nearby, so I could check on dinner, baking in the oven.

When I came back, I found Brynne and Hadley "giving Ruby her medicine" from the diaper caddy:




"Kills over 99.9% of harmful bacteria," and I was 99.9% positive it was going to kill Ruby too.

You remember these?

This is Mr. Yuk. He even has his own Facebook page!


I can remember one sticking to our rotary phone when I was growing up, but we are just not cool enough, or smart enough to have a rotary phone.
Note to self: Buy a rotary phone and promptly stick Mr. Yuk on the receiver!!
So, I had to waste 90 seconds of precious time finding the number online.

The nurse was great, she told me that I needed to nurse Ruby right away, and that a baby her size could drink up to two teaspoons of strait ethyl alcohol, before it's a problem. TWO TEASPOONS!

I was pretty sure that her little doctors couldn't have squirted two teaspoons into her mouth, especially since, like the cooperative patient that she is, Ruby had spit it out all over her face. The spit had an interesting powdery texture, so I, rationally, assumed she was also foaming at the mouth, and that there was still a 75% chance that Ruby was going to die.

To assure me, Brynne and Hadley explained that since Ruby was spitting up her "medicine" they were sopping it up with baby powder (also from the diaper caddy), which had pooled in white, sticky clumps in her ear, and around her neck.

The nurse said that as long as she didn't inhale it into her lungs, she would be fine, and I should just monitor her breathing to make sure.

After the excitement had died down, Ruby's life expectancy was dialed back to normal, and I could speak without shrieking, Brynne and Hadley and I had a talk.

For days afterwards, I would routinely hear their sweet little voices saying,
Ruby only eats Mama's nipples. 
Perfect. So. We all learned a lesson.


P.S. Before someone emails me about the dangers of baby powder, and how babies can inhale it and die...I know this. I have never used baby powder for anything other than throwing some on top of a stinky diaper in the trash. I do this, so I don't have to take out the trash. I have no idea why I had baby powder in the diaper caddy, and it isn't there any more.

3 comments:

Melissa Aldrich said...

Welcome back with this hysterical entry into motherhood. I may have needed this on the day I only had boxer briefs in the car when he had his first accident every in the car seat and took him in to play at the children's museum for 2.5 hours that way :-p

We've totally got this mother of three thing down, eh?

Jessica said...

Oh my that made me laugh out loud!! I've had things like that happen too this year(like the time Max put pony tail holders in 3 month old Luke's mouth & I had a minor panic attack..) I'm glad everything turned out ok!!

Mary Cavalier said...

What a scary moment. Reminds me of some incidents with a Katie and Bekah Somehow Bekah survived :-)