Whatever is Lovely

On Fridays my friend Melissa and I are exploring True Beauty through a series of letters. Join us as we explore Beauty in our lives. We look forward to hearing from you.
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Dearest Julia,

Truth is an elusive thing, but not because it is hidden. No, truth is found where it can be plainly seen—

In the word of God,

In studying the nature of things,

In the knitting of things unseen in a womb.

Yes, truth is easily found.

Yet, truth is still elusive in the physical moment it’s needed.

You and I (and probably most women) are prime examples of this elusive truth phenomenon. We know that God created women beautiful. We read it in the Word, we see it in the women around us, we hear it from our husband’s lips.

Somehow in the physical moment of looking in the mirror,

or the moment we open a magazine,

or the moment we enter a swimming pool

the truth, the belief in the known fact that women are beautiful, suddenly becomes elusive. We cannot recall the truth the moment we’re asked to live it.

So what can we do to keep the truth that we were skillfully and beautifully knitted in perfect focus so that we can really live out the implications?

I think you hit on one answer to this question last week: We can place truth in visible places around our homes.

Tape it to our cabinets.

Stencil it to our bedroom walls.

Write it with a dry erase marker on our bathroom mirrors.

Hang art prints above our mantels.

Place sticky notes on our rear view mirrors.

Daily seeing this truth that God’s Beauty resides in us keeps the truth at the forefront of our minds. Therefore, when we’re tempted to deny the truth or act as if it’s not true, we’re able to quickly recall the truth our eyes have soaked on. We’re training ourselves to think and act on the truth.

You know training, Julia. You rise two mornings a week, long before the sun, to attend Boot Camp. You train your body to be strong. But if training your body to be strong is so important, how much more important must it be to train our minds to believe and act upon truth?

Philippians 4:8 give us one way to train our minds:

“Finally, brethren, what ever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things.”

So how can we make that verse practical? How do we train ourselves to dwell, to think constantly, on this pure, lovely, and excellent truth?

You’ve already taught us one: write it on the door frames.

But what are some other ways that we can soak on the truth that beauty resides in us?

1. Memorize Scripture Truth. Committing scripture to memory changes your perspective in those moments you’re tempted to act or respond like truth isn’t real. It also lets you minister to others, giving hope in a moment of need. You won’t need to carry the Bible when its Words are already hidden in your heart. Amy’s recent post has a concise list of some of the scriptures regarding beauty.

2. Talk about Truth. How often is our talk with other women idle? We gossip or we talk about a great product or a fabulous sale. This talk profits our hearts nothing. When we share what we are learning we build up each others' hearts. We challenge each other to grow to be more like Christ.

3. Say Thank You. First, say thank you to God that He made you beautiful. Then, say thank you humbly each time your husband (or a friend) states this truth. Don’t argue, don’t blaspheme, just express humble gratitude.

4. Celebrate. Yes, celebrate that first time you successfully recite that verse. Celebrate that lovely conversation you had with a friend. Celebrate that moment you first said “Thank you” to your husband rather than denying the truth that he so lovingly points out. Call a friend and celebrate verbally. Give yourself a pedicure or a chocolate kiss. Make a big check mark on a list. Celebrate each grace-filled triumph; celebration keeps motivation high. Celebration caused joy to abound.

Epic Fail

I've got to say--I don't know how mamas can work outside the home away from their babies all day long--I tip my hat to all the working mamas out there! Today was my first taste of this, and it was one of the harder things I've ever had to do, and definitely the hardest thing I've done since our girls have been born. The connection I have with my daughters is physical. I don't know if it's because my body bore them and now feeds them, or if it's because I spend more time with them than anyone else and can comfort them best. I've heard it said that having children is like your heart walking around outside of your body. I certainly believe this. There is vulnerability in having something I love so much in the care of someone other than myself. I ache to hear them crying on the phone (other than just the uncomfortable feeling of my milk letting down).

I had so much anxiety leading up to my actual departure--I let worry just consume me, to the point that it was physical. My stomach hurt and literally my heart ached! I cried, I fretted--again with the whole "not being in control thing" (an apparent theme in my life)--it was overwhelming to me. I had a small job to do that didn't take long--I left at 5:45 AM, well before the girls start their day, and was home by 10:30. No big deal, but I let fear, panic and doubt wash over me in huge waves for a good 24 hours.

The reason this first time away from the girls was such a "failure" was because I failed to trust anyone or anything except my feelings, which were completely going haywire. I failed to trust my husband to oversee caring for his own children, my mother-in-law who raised three children and most importantly I didn't trust God, who cares even for the sparrows to take care of and protect my daughters in my relatively short absence. Each day my prayers is that I would have that "...peace from God that transcends all understanding...." I need it, because I am a wreck of anxiety on my own. Today I most certainly did not have that peace, because I didn't go any further. "Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--I should think of those things (Philippians 4:6-8).

If I had the day to do over, I would probably still be anxious, but I'd like to think that I could also maintain some perspective that got away from me, and if nothing else, maybe not have quite such an achy belly. A friend shared this verse with me yesterday, "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed , for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness." Lamentations 3:22-23. Thank goodness for his love and compassions, and for another day.

Hushed: True Beauty Conversations

My friend Melissa and I are continuing our conversation about Beauty this morning. We've been talking about True Beauty through a series of letters on Fridays: What is Beauty? What will we tell our daughters about Beauty? We're so glad you're joining us. We would love to hear from you!

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My girls have an obsession with Goodnight Moon.
It's not what you'd expect. They're not excited about seeing the moon or the cow jumping over the moon. Not even the kittens who they'll meow for are the reason this book is so dearly loved.
As soon as they hear me say "And a bowl full of mush...", both girls are holding little fingers to their wide open mouth in joyful anticipation. They're waiting for the moment when they can say, "Hush!"

I feel hushed.

I've felt this way for a couple weeks now. I guess you can feel that a little from the my Living the Truth post and the silence on my blog.

Who am I (so fallible, so prideful, so weak!) to sit and write or speak of anything holy?
Who am I to have been invited into His Story?
And the Accuser darts in to make me feel guilty for this time of hush, for speaking what I can't manage to live, or even for putting myself out there at all. "Retreat!" he cries and perhaps I listen too often to the wrong voice. I find myself quickly buried under an avalanche of perceived expectations, failures, and criticism.

And there's only one way to get out from underneath an avalanche of this size:

To Count Truth.

To Count Grace.
To Count the Moments.
To Count Beauty Bestowed.

My gratitude journal lies empty this week, some little girl ran off with it and I have seen no need to hunt it down. And because it is missing, I haven't stopped to savor beauty. I haven't truly seen the things in my life that are truth.
Whatever is lovely... think on it.

Two girls are screaming now rather than napping... cutting these last 8 teeth between them has been hard work. The only truth that I can meditate on is:

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heaven. ~Ecclesiastes 3:1

And that is a beautiful truth. A truth worth being repeated daily to myself.

Teething is a season, and it will soon pass. Savor those moments snuggling that poor baby.

Being hushed is a season, and it will soon pass. Savor those moments of having a quiet and broken spirit and use them to fill yourself with the beautiful truths found only in the word of God.

In Search of Real Modesty: True Beauty Conversations

My friend Melissa and I are continuing our conversation about Beauty this morning. We've been talking about True Beauty through a series of letters on Fridays: What is Beauty? What will we tell our daughters about Beauty? We're so glad you're joining us. We would love to hear from you!


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Dearest Julia,

Modesty

It's such a buzz word in the Christian community.  Yet the word means such different things to each person.  Some think modesty means flowing dresses and head coverings. Others believe modesty means women should only wear skirts and dresses.  There a new movement for modesty coupled with modern dress.  Finally, there are those who feel that bikinis can be modest because they cover all the important bits.

But I'm going to consult Dictionary.com and go back to the definition of the word itself.

Modesty

1. The quality of being modest; freedom from vanity, boastfulness
2. Regard for decency of behavior, dress, speech
3. Simplicity; Moderation

Modest

1. Having or showing a moderate or humble estimate of one's merits, importance, etc; free from vanity, egotism, boastfulness or great pretensions.
2. Free from ostentation or showy extravagance
3. Having or showing regard for the decencies of behavior, speech, dress, etc.
4. Limited or moderate in amount, extent, etc

It seems to me that the quality of modesty might just go a bit deeper than convictions on what clothing we should or should not wear.

I love applying knowledge to the act of everyday living so I'm going to break down these definitions into an evaluative tool.

Having a Moderate or Humble Estimate of One's Merits, Importance, etc

• When things do not go according to my plan,  (like when your 18-month-old pukes on the porch of the house you were walking into for a birthday party, or no matter how hard you coupon, you're unable to drop the grocery budget below the number you believe it should be at... not that these life-altering events have ever happened to me :-p) do I lash out in anger at those who didn't do things my way or ask God why he wasn't following my day planner?
• When I speak with my friends, do I truly listen to them or am I thinking of the next thing that I'm going to say?
• When my husband or friend compliments my beauty or something I have done,  do I argue against their compliment (false modesty) or do I humbly say "Thank you" (true modesty)

Free from Vanity, Boastfulness, or Great Pretensions

•  When I dress in the morning am I thinking, "I look smokin' in this!" or am I making sure that the way I dress is flattering in a way the glorifies the Living Christ?
• Am I constantly talking about my latest accomplishment? Do I grow weary or resentful if I feel that my role in a group is not acknowledged with gratitude and compliments?

Regard for Decency of Behavior, Dress, and Speech

• When I let compliments ooze over my male friends (or even my wealthy popular female friends), is my motivation to build them up in Christ or to garner their attention?
• When things aren't going as I planned, do I blame others, throw frustrated or angry fits, pout, or withdraw from an activity/relationship?  And when I do these things (after all, no one is perfect), do I admit and apologize for my inappropriate response/behavior?
• When I put on a shirt/dress/pants/bathing suit, am I tastefully covered or am I drawing eyes and minds to parts that should remain a private mystery?
• When I speak, do I bring to light whatever is lovely, or do I complain or waste words on meaningless conversation or, worse yet, gossip?
• When I speak in a relationship with a man (who is not my husband whether I am married or not), do I reveal parts of my heart that should be reserved for my God and my (future) husband?

Free from Ostentation or Showy Extravagance

• Am I dressing to gain attention? 
• Am I paying large amounts of money for designer clothing label status rather than investing in an equally flattering and equally stylish item that is priced appropriately with regards to my budget?

Simplicity; Moderation

• Am I exercising in moderation to keep my body healthy and strong, or am I working-out excessively in pursuit of an ideal body?
• Am I eating a piece of chocolate cake as a sweet indulgence or do I binge because I've had a bad day and the cake brings me comfort?

I suddenly feel as if this little definition breakdown/questionnaire is quite heavy and maybe even legalistic sounding.  I'll be the first to say that I don't measure up to this standard of modesty, particularly in the "Moderate Estimate of my Own Merits" and "Decency of Speech" categories.  But reading through lists like these (and even lists like the Ten Commandments), makes us aware of where our hearts need the loving care of our Lord to produce fruit.  Sometimes feeling a little wounded is good for growth.

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Julia, when we first started this series, I was immediately struck by the following verses on beauty.  I feel like these verses pretty much nail both outward beauty and the heart filled with modesty.  Just for an interesting little tidbit, the Greek word for beauty used here is the word "Kosmeō".  It's where we derive our word "cosmetics".

Wives, in the same way (context: as Jesus endured insults and the cross without bitterness or retaliation) submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives.  Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God's sight. 1 Peter 3:1-4

May we live pure and reverent lives; lives filled with the modesty that comes from knowing the glory of a God who is above all things.  May we seek the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit.

Some good reads

I am so honored that two very lovely ladies have given me blog awards.

Heather at TwinSane Asylum gave the Liebster blogging award. Liebster is a lovely little German word that means "beloved person". That phrase conjures up such warm feelings for me. Thank you, Heather.

If you have a moment, stop by Heather's place and give her some encouragement---she counts her gifts, just like I do, but sometimes it's hard, like last week when her babies were sick. We mamas belong to one another---loving each other through words is powerful and healing. 

A huge thank you to sweet Miss Megan at Deuces Wild & An Ace in the Hole for awarding me with the Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award.

Megan and I have connected through breastfeeding twins, and through desperately trying to figure out how to wear out and entertain our toddlers through perusing the time-warp that is Pinterest. Megan's a great encourager----she's funny, she's honest, and has more energy than I ever did when I was pregnant!
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Here's a few reading facts for your reading pleasure:

I did, in fact, get my nose pierced this past weekend. Here you go, B. Proof:

I now have four piercings on the left side of my head. Only two on the right. [FYI, the guy who pierced my nose said you should pierce your nose on the same side that your part your hair---who knew it was such a science?!]

I really hate shaving my legs. I mean really. But I love the results too much to give it up.

I hate snakes. I've blogged about this before. But I hadn't had my fear tested for a really long time, until just recently. We were walking, with the girls, at the nature reserve when Brynne and I came across a snake coiled on the path. I put Brynne behind me and squealed in horror screamed. The snake raised its head and was hissing at me. My brave husband came and picked it up to move it off the path as this snake was striking at him. He assured me that a garter snake wasn't going to hurt anyone---I'm still not so sure. Ugh!


Sewing things gives me a great feeling of accomplishment. I don't own a sewing machine, but even if I just sew on a button, or mend a small tear---I feel accomplished. I can look at, whatever it is, in use, which would otherwise not be if it wasn't for my mad very mediocre sewing skills.

I would love to own a sewing machine. I see all these cute clothes on Pinterest, and I think, I could do that.

I'm trying to be more thrifty lately. I've recently made my own laundry detergent, shower cleaner, stain remover, mod podge and I've attempted to make my own body wash twice, but failed both times (please, someone, help me with that one!).
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Okay here are a few blogs I love if you have a few minutes---go check them out!

My dear friend is blogging every day for Lent. She is brilliant and insightful. Please, do yourself a favor and read this.

I've found lots of fabulous craft/teaching ideas for the girls over at H is for Homeschooling.

I Can Teach My Child is another fabulous blog with lots of teaching/crafting ideas.


The Iowa Farmer's Wife is a fabulous blog filled with a mama's journey to teach, craft and love her toddler and preschooler. Check out her Pinterest page too!

B over at Little Grovers is celebrating her boys' second birthday. The birthday theme is completely adorable---check it out!

Three Weeks of Thankfulness

Just a note before I begin. I began giving thanks on my blog once a week (mostly) after I began following the blog of a fellow twin mom, who has been a great encouragement to me over the past  months. To truly give credit, where credit is due, the origin of counting blessings comes from this lovely lady over here. I should have been citing her all along, but my blog illiteracy kept me from understanding how to do that until now--thank you, Melissa!

Becoming Brynne and Hadley's mother was the most overwhelming thing I've ever gone through. I counted down each day--minutes until I needed to nurse the girls again, hours until Brad would walk in the door, days until the weekend. I would even verbalize that I couldn't wait until the girls were older and things were easier. Instead of enjoying the moment, the spot where God had me right then and there, I was living for whatever was next, whatever was easier, whatever was down the road. Precious moments were slipping away from me, and I wasn't acknowledging them. Ugh--it makes me cry to write that!

Counting my blessings, things to be thankful for, is and has been a delight for me--I love when I find a moment, and now consciously make a note to remember it, to cherish it, and write it down. I would encourage each of you to try this. It has been such a great blessing to see the gifts in my marriage, my children, my family and my friendships--to live life in the here and now.

And now--three weeks worth of blessings:

167. Great nine month check-up for the girls.

168. Healthy weight gain; Hadley is 16 lbs 8 oz and Brynne is 18 lbs even.

169. 75 degrees for a week in November.

170. Laying on the deck with Brad listening to music and looking up at the stars.

171. Seeing two shooting stars in one night.

172. Scooting.

173. Hanging out with Laila before baby Nori gets here.

174. Laila playing with the twins, so that I could pack and make babyfood for our weekend travel.

175. Having a small enough butt to fit between the twins' carseats in the backseat.

176. Surviving the first holiday travel of the season.

177. Surviving 24 hours by myself with the twins.

178. Holding sweet baby Noria.

179. Playdate with Rashell and Max.

180. Max lending the girls one of his toys to play with.

181. Orange noses from too much carrots/pumpkin/squash.

182. Rearranging our furniture in the living room.

183. Walk and playing with the Becca and the twins in the warm Monday before Thanksgiving.

184. Becca loaning us her pack n' play for our Thanksgiving travels.

185. Safe travels to my parents' home in the rain.

186. Brynne falling asleep as soon as we arrived.

187. Hadley's snuggles as she figured out how to sleep in a strange place.

188. Great napping away from home.

189. Driving around to let the girls nap a bit longer.

190. The lady at the store who thought my sisters and I were triplets.

191. Brisk walks with my sisters.

192. Watching the girls play with their aunts and uncles and grandparents.

193. Brynne and Hadley's resilience and adaptability away from home.

194. Thanksgiving feast with Brad.

195. By doing this I remember to be thankful in all circumstances in my everyday, not just on Thanksgiving.

196. Putting up Christmas decorations while watching Love Actually with Brad.

197. Two new stockings hanging over our fireplace.

Mama Loves: Kickoff

Hey there, and welcome to the first week of Mama Loves! I can't wait to hear about what you have to share with us!

Mama Loves is chance for mamas to share their loves of: toys, gear, recipes, beauty products--whatever makes your life just a little bit easier as a mama. My hope is that we can from a sisterhood of mamas who support and encourage one another through sharing what works. Each week I will share one thing, or several things that we are loving around here. I hope you'll join us and share your Mama Loves with us!

I have a couple Mama Loves to share with you this week, so without further ado, I'll kick things off:

1. Our girls absolutely love this book:

I'm so glad I virtually stumbled upon it while browsing children's books. I swear those folks over at amazon can read my mind sometimes. The verdict is still out on whether I think that's cool or creepy. I'll let keep you posted.

So, From Head to Toe. It's a great interactive book, which I love. We actually have to stand up to read this book. It goes through the body from head to toe, having your child:

• turn your head like a penguin
• bend your neck like giraffe
• raise your shoulders like a buffalo
• wave your arms like a monkey
• clap your hands like a seal
• thump your chest like a gorilla
• arch your back like a cat
• wiggle your hips like a crocodile (so funny!)
• bend your knees like a camel
• kick your legs like a donkey
• stomp your foot like an elephant (my girls' favorite--we stomp every time we see an elephant now!)
• wiggle your toes like "I"

At 18 months, my girls can do most of the movements. There are a few they struggle with still, so it will be challenging for them for awhile, which is great! It's so fun to watch them coordinate their bodies as I read off the different activities. I've "caught" the girls a few times reading the book by themselves "practicing" their moves.

2. I found this sassy nail polish color that I really love from OPI called Lucerne-tainly Look Marvelous.

Seriously, it would be such a blast to get together with girlfriends, drink some wine and come up with nail polish colors. I'm convinced that is exactly what goes on over at OPI.

It's a dark silver color, so it's versatile, especially if you, like me, wear primarily silver jewelry.

My toes are always painted. Mostly, because my naked toenails are a scary, scary sight! 

When I want to feel really pretty, I paint my fingernails.

So, last Saturday, the hubs and I had a quasi-date. I say quasi-date, because we went to dinner with some of his clients. It was a lovely evening, though.

I rocked Lucerne-tainly Look Marvelous on my toes and my fingers, and felt like a million bucks!

I can't wait to read all your Mama Loves this week!

To celebrate the kickoff of Mama Loves, if you link up, or leave a comment with your Mama Loves, you are entered into a drawing. One lucky lady will win a bottle of Lucerne-tainly Look Marvelous! Spread the word, tell your friends! Winner will be announced next Saturday (8/13).

(Make sure to provide the link to the specific post you want to share in the linky below. It's really easy, just follow the directions.)

Duck Tape is the Most Amazing Invention Ever

I'll be the first to admit, I'm not always up on things. But--once I discover the greatness of ____________ (fill in the blank), I'm all in.

For instance, I just discovered how amazing eBay was last year. The competitive bear that hibernates in me (most of the time) came out to play. I sat on the couch refreshing my computer every few minutes as the time ticked down to the end of the sale. I just HAD to win the must-have baby product. Once I won, I posted my triumph proudly as my facebook status. And someone commented, "Welcome to 1998".

Whatever.

I won, so there.

I have just discovered Duck Tape. I never realized just how spectacular Duck Tape is. I just bought my first roll of it this past week. It makes me feel like this:

 
(with a few more clothes on)

Did you know that Duck Tape comes in all kinds of colors and prints now?! I had no idea! I thought it was all just boring grey. This is the one I bought:

The girls have been loving on their books, so I've done a little repair work.

And my ring keeps tearing holes in the mat I use as a changing pad. We're already on our second one, so I decided to fix it myself.

Duck Tape was invented in 1942, so I'm just a few decades behind.

I don't care---I think the stuff rocks.

And now you know.

In completely unrelated news. Last week a lovely lady, Branson (isn't that just such a cool name?), at My Reflection of Something, chose my post, How Do I Love Thee?, as one of her picks for the week of February 18th. I'm honored, and flattered, Branson. Thank you.