Friday, March 4, 2011

What About Our Daughters?: True Beauty Conversations

On Fridays, my friend, Melissa, and I are exploring True Beauty through a series of letters. Please join us as we continue the conversation. This topic is so rich, and strikes a chord with most women. We look forward to hearing your thoughts as we continue to delve in!


Oh, how your words resonated with me last week.

Truth definitely plays a game of hide and seek with me when I get into the swimming pool. And peering into the mirror in a dressing room trying on swimsuits?! Fahgetaboutit!

I often fret, Melissa, about the messages I will communicate to my daughters in those moments when I feel inadequate. The moments when truth alludes me.

My best friend growing up lived just a few doors away. We played together often. One day when I went to her house, she informed me that she was on a diet; she thought she needed to lose weight. She encouraged me to join her on this diet.

We were eight years old.

This memory stands out so vividly to me, because before that moment, I never knew there was anything wrong with me. I didn't know to critique the size or shape of my body.

It wasn't my friend's fault. Her mother was constantly dieting and spoke openly about all the ways she was dissatisfied with her appearance. It was no surprise, then, that my friend followed suit, even at her young age. Her ears were assailed with that kind of talk.

I don't want my daughters to have an experience like my friend did, hearing their mama express constant displeasure with her body.

Inevitably, my daughters, and your daughters, Melissa, will reach an awareness that they are different.

My desire and prayer for our girls is that they celebrate their differences. Delight in being daughters of The King.

How can we foster this, Melissa?

Please follow me over here to read the rest of my letter.


Anonymous said...

I fully believe that girls will develop similar body issues to that of their mother. I will teach Nori that she only gets one body, the one that God so carefully made for her. The one that no one gets to criticize, the one that no one gets to touch, the one that must be taken care of with proper nutrition and physical activity. It is the only one you get, so love it fully.

Corinne and Jason Ritz said...

WOW!!! I LOVE this! I have 1 daughter and 4 sons. My daughter will say things like, "I need to go running." And ask things like, "Do I look fat in these jeans?" She is TEN! I realized that those are the exact same things she's heard me say to my husband. I also realized that my internal dialogue with myself is SO negative concerning my body. This was all about a year ago. I have made a serious effort to change all of this. We often talk about taking care of our bodies now, but it is positive and not extreme. When I heard my daughter say horrible things about her body I realized that this is how my Father in Heaven must feel when he hears me say the same things about my wonderful body that he has given me. Very eye opening realization for me.