Maybe I'm the only one.
Sometimes I become overwhelmed with the blessing:
My handsome, hardworking husband who serves me so selflessly.
My bright, curious daughters.
Friends.
Family.
Things growing green in the dark earth.
I stop and give thanks. I write it down---that moment, that feeling, that gift. I want to remember, to give thanks over and over. I want to relive the joy.
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When I was 27 I laid in a hospital bed on a ventilator for the better part of a month.
You're supposed to get mono as a kid--kissing boys and drinking after your friends.
I waited.
There were times when I hung onto life by threads.
I don't remember most of it---a blessing.
When I came through to the other side, I thought:
My life still has purpose on this earth. I wonder what God has in store for me that he spared my life.I haven't thought about that experience for a long time. After it happened, I felt like I was supposed to have some sort of revelation or do a complete life-overhaul, but normalcy returned and time kept marching.
It occurred to me today---one big duh/aha moment.
Here is my purpose. Right here. I'm living it. God kept me around for all of this.
Wife to Brad.
Mama to Brynne and Hadley.
Friend.
Sister.
Gardener.
I bet those plants sure are glad I stuck around!
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For the girls' first birthday they were given the book On the Day You Were Born by Debra Frasier about how Earth ushers in and cradles new life. Really, I think it's been more a gift for me. You can't help but feel significant when you read it.
I love this book!
The last few lines of the book go like this:
And as they held you closeToday, as I picked up my babbling daughters from their cribs, still warm with sleep, my chest felt full. I whispered into their curving ears,
they whispered into your open, curving ear,
"We are so glad you've come!"
"We are so glad you've come!"
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7 comments:
Beautiful post. It's amazing to me how God's plans for us take time to unfold.
I bought the girls a similar book for their birthday this year, entitled On the Night That You Were Born (Nancy Tillman). It brings me to tears almost every time I read it.
My mom passed away 12 years ago, and I have mourned her loss as much these past couple of years as I did the first couple of months after she died. I had a particularly hard time on my birthday this year, I think having just celebrated the girls' birthday and having appreciated how "significant" they are.
There's no one quite like your mother to appreciate you...but you're right, in that we are so significant, as evidenced by the many roles we play on this green earth. :)
Beautiful.
Thank you for such a beautiful post.
Oh Julia, that was BEAUTIFUL! Just like you! You brought tears to my eyes with those beautiful words of gratitude!
Beautifully written! I love how gratitude spills out of you. It's contagious, and encourages me to view the world around me through a different lens.
Beautiful post. It's amazing to me how God's plans for us take time to unfold.
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